Stalkerish And Matchmaking
by Sadomasochist2716
Summary: Jou is on a mission:to help the Yamis and Hikaris be together! But, can he succeed, when he has a stalker who keeps following him, the voice in his head keeps telling him that he has feelings for THE Kaiba Seto, and his mental state is at stake? Only time can tell... Puppy/puzzle/tender/bronze shipping. And some other pairings as well.
1. Chapter 1

**Me: 'Hi ya everyone, this is my very first YGO fanfic ever! I'm so excited! Not to mention, my first yaoi fanfic as well. Don't you just love yaoi?!'**

**Seto: 'Why am I here?'**

**Me: 'You are my guest of honour this week. Besides, I like you.' **

**Seto: '… you like me?'**

**Me: 'No, no, not that kind of **_**like**_**. I like you like every fan likes his/her favorite character(s). And you are one my favorite characters in YGO.'**

**Seto: '…oh.'**

**Me: 'Besides, everyone knows you and Jou are in a relationship, and who am I to interfere, ne?'**

**Seto: 'The Mutt and I are in a **_**what**_**?'**

**Me: 'Oh, don't be shy. That's the truth of the universe after all. Ok, enough talk. On with the story. Seto, do the disclaimer, would you please?'**

**Seto: -reads the paper- '**_**Sadomasochist2716 doesn't own Yugioh or any of the characters. If she did, it would become a yaoi paradise.**_** What the…?'**

**Me: 'Enjoy the story, everyone!'**

**Seto: 'I still demand to know what do you mean by the Mutt and I are in a relationship!'**

**x x x **

**Warning:**** Yaoi, also known as boys love. If it's not your cup of tea, feel free to leave. Thank you!**

**x x x**

**Chapter 1: Someone is watching me!**

A normal day in Domino. The sun was shining. Birds were chirping. People were talking. The usual.

Jounouchi Katsuya, also known as Jou for short, was happily walking down the street. Why was he happy, you may ask. There were many reasons to be happy. First of all, he was early today, and that meant the teacher couldn't bitch him for being late. Next, the chaos caused by those Sennen Items was finally over, and everyone was happy. The Yamis, instead of moving on to the After Life, had decided to stay in the modern world, much to the happiness of their Hikaris. Even though his friends didn't admit it, Jou knew the Hikaris and the Yamis all had feeling for each other, and it was just so sweet. The small problem was that, they didn't know their other half returned the feeling, and therefore, kept their own feeling to themselves.

Jou chuckled. Silly, silly Yamis and Hikaris. Maybe he should play matchmaker, considering that he didn't really have anything fun to do at the moment.

_Funny you would think that, playing matchmaker to your friends when you yourself are still struggling with your own feeling._

Jou groaned. Oh great, _the voice _was back. And the psychologist told him everything was back to normal now. Lying bitch. He really needed to sue her, then changed his psychologist again.

_- Be quiet, you. And what do ya mean by my own feeling? -_

_You know what I mean. Admit it, you like Kaiba._

Jou was frozen on spot. What did _the voice_ just say?

_- What the hell? I don't have any feeling for that… that Moneybags! Ya'r wrong, ya hear me. I hate 'im, he hates me. End of the discussion! -_

_Sure, keep telling yourself that. Remember though, I'm __the voice_ _in your head. I know what you truly feel, Jounouchi._

_- Whatever. Piss off. -_

Just like that, _the voice_ faded, and Jou stood there, wondering if he just argued with himself.

Maybe he shouldn't skip his medicine this morning.

'Jou, are you okay?' a soft voice snapped Jou out of his own thought. Turning around, he smiled at the sight of his best friend, Muto Yugi, who was accompanied by his Yami, Atemu. The former Pharaoh finally had his own body (all thanks to Ra) and joined Domino High under the name of Atemu Sennen.

'Morning Yug', morning Até,' Jou greeted. 'And I'm fine, no need to worry. Just zoned out a little bit, no big deal.'

Yugi looked unconvinced, but before he could say anything else, another voice joined the conversation.

'Well, well, well, what a surprise. The Mutt is early for once.'

The taunting voice sent shiver down Jou's spine. Slowly turning around, the blonde was met with the sight of Kaiba Seto, the young CEO of the multi-billion dollar company – the Kaiba Corp. Clad in his usual defied gravity trench coat (he had money, he could wear whatever the hell he wanted to school), carrying in hand his familiar suitcase, Atemu's cousin in the past was smirking his 'I'm sexy and I know it' smirk, which made Jou's knees become weak for some unknown reason (_I told you that you like him. – You again? I thought I told you to piss off? -_), while 'Kaiba-sama's fanclub', as the fangirls dubbed themselves, swooned dreamily.

'What the 'ell is yar problem, Moneybags,' Jou snapped. 'I didn't do anything to ya, so why is it that ya keep picking on meh? And I ain't no dog!'

'Could have fool me, Mutt,' Seto said arrogantly. He enjoyed picking on Jou after all. It was interesting.

A tick mark appeared on the side of Jou's head, and he glared at his enemy.

'Shaddat, Rich Boy,' he growled. 'Don't make meh punch ya.'

'I would like to see you try, Mutt,' Seto taunted. 'Maybe you would be able to land a hit today.'

'Why you…'

Before Jou could launch himself at the brunet and throttle him, a pair of arms held him back. Looking over his shoulder, Jou caught the sight of Bakura (who decided to enroll to Domino High under the name of Ryou Bakura just for the fun of it). The albino Yami was the one holding him back. Behind him, Jou could see Bakura Ryou slowly making his way over to join their not so normal group.

'What the 'ell, Bak'ra?' Jou barked in annoyance. 'Lemme go. I hav ta punch the hell outta that sonovabitch. How many time I hav ta tell him that I ain't no dog for him ta understand?'

'Calm down, Retriever,' Bakura said calmly. 'As much as I'd love to see you hurt the Priest, I still have to tell you that those rabid fangirls would sure shred you to pieces if you so much as to touch even a strand of his hair.'

He motioned to the group of fuming fangirls behind Seto, who were all glaring at Jou in a threatening manner. Jou sweat dropped at this, and grudgingly tried to control his anger.

No matter how much he wanted to punch the brunet bastard, the fangirls scared him. He didn't want to face their wrath for touching their idol. There was a rumour that some idiot had had a gall to insult THE Kaiba Seto in front of a group of the CEO's fangirls, and the police still couldn't find his body anywhere. Jou seriously didn't want to suffer the same fate, no matter whether or not the rumour was true.

'This is the first time I see the Thief King said something intelligent,' Atemu smirked. 'So he does have some common sense somewhere in his brain.'

Bakura glared at the former Pharaoh coldly. 'Shut it.'

Atemu just continued with the smirk, which seemed to piss the former tomb robber off even more.

'Atemu, stop picking fight with Bakura,' Yugi scowled his Yami. 'Honestly, you two act like kids sometimes, making me wonder if you two really are over 3000 years old.'

'But I have to agree with Atemu this time,' Ryou mused. 'It's strange to see 'Kura said something makes sense like that.'

Atemu's smirk widened, while Bakura turned and glared at his Hikari.

'Yadonushi, you are supposed to be on my side, not his!' the former Thief King more or less shouted out. 'You are MY Hikari, don't you remember? And YOU!' he now let go off of Jou to fully turn and seize Atemu by the collar. 'How dare you turn my yadonushi against ME?'

' 'Kura, stop it!' Ryou cried, trying to remove his Yami's hands from the Pharaoh's shirt. 'I'm not siding with Atemu! I'm just saying that it was strange for you to stop a fight when you usually just encourage it to happen! Let go off him, 'Kura! Stop making a scene!'

In the middle of the chaos, no one seemed to notice that Seto had left with his fangirls. Jou didn't realize the CEO had gone as well, and paying attention to Marik and Malik instead, who just showed up and demanded to know what they just missed.

'Well, I don't see what's strange,' Malik said, which immediately caused everyone's attention. 'I mean, it's pretty obvious why Bakura did that, right? After all, he and Marik see Jou as their pretty little sister… I mean, little brother, so it's only natural for him to protect Jou from being maim to death by those rabid fangirls who show a ridiculous loyalty to Kaiba. He has no problem with Jou having a fight with Kaiba because he knows no one will die in those fights, but it's not the case when it comes to Kaiba's fanclub. Remember the rumour? They still can't find that boy!'

'You know what, I think Malik is right,' Yugi nodded in agreement, while Atemu looked surprised.

'Wow, something is seriously not right today if even Malik is capable of saying something makes so much sense,' he exclaimed.

'DON'T insult Hikari-mine, baka-Pharaoh!' Marik snapped, which started another bickering between the Yamis, while the Hikaris tried to calm their darks down.

Jou chuckled at the scene. It amused him to see the three former spirits tried to choke each other to death in the middle of the street.

The blonde mentally slapped himself once he realized what he just thought.

_- Damn, how could I think something like that? It's not funny when my friends try to kill each other! What is wrong with me? I REALLY shouldn't skip my medicine… Knew it was not a right thing to do…-_

At that moment, another chill ran down Jou's spine, and it had nothing to do with Seto this time. No, this chill was different, completely different from all the chills Jou had ever felt from the CEO. But the blonde knew the feeling this type of chill brought with it all too well. After all, he had experienced this feeling many times in the past, during his time in the gang.

The feeling of a prey being eyed by its predator.

Twirling around suddenly, Jou tried to find the source of the feeling. No such luck though, because the feeling just suddenly disappeared, like it didn't even exist in the first place.

Jou blinked. Was it possible that he just imagined it out? Maybe he DID imagine it out. After all, this was not the first time he felt and saw things.

He once saw Red Eyes dancing Gangnam Style. Not to mention Dark Magician making out with Dark Magician Girl on the table in his kitchen. And more than once did he see unicorns farting rainbows all over the place. All of that had to say something about his mental state.

Okay, it's official. He would never skip his medicine ever again.

**x x x**

Or maybe, someone was indeed watching him.

Now that was creepy.

Jou was kind of nervous at first when he believed his persecutory delusion was back, if he imagined that someone was spying on him. But then, the feeling returned, and Yugi just admitted he had the feeling that someone was watching him as well.

'It was only for a second though, but it still gave me an uneasy feeling,' the smaller tri-coloured hair boy mumbled when they settled down for lunch.

'Like someone is planning something behind your back that you are not sure if you like how the plan turns out or not?' Ryou asked. 'That feeling, right?'

Yugi nodded, looking curious. 'Ry, you felt that too?'

'I also felt that,' Malik joined in. 'It didn't last long enough for me to pinpoint where it came from though.'

Jou slightly went paled. So there really was someone out there that was observing him and his friends? Yugi, Ryou and Malik felt that too, so it must be real this time.

_But you do realize that you feel __it_ _more than them, right? They only felt __it__ for a brief second, but you have been feeling __it__ until now._

Of course he knew that. He was feeling it right now after all!

'Someone is spying on Hikari-mine?' Marik frowned, moving closer to his light in a protective manner, which made Jou forgot all about it for a moment to grin. Marik and Malik looked so cute, sitting so close like that.

He was so shipping them.

'I also don't like the idea of some unknown person spying on aibou,' Atemu nodded, looking serious. 'Whoever that person is, they are not allowed to give aibou an uneasy feeling, even if it was only for a second.'

'Protective much?' Bakura raised a brow, but Jou could see that the taller albino also moved a bit closer to his counterpart.

_- Heh, I will sure ship Até/Yug' and Bak'ra/Ryou as well. – _Jou thought eagerly. _– That's it, I have made up my mind. Jou-Cupid shows up for a mission! -_

From the back of his mind, the type of music you usually heard when a superhero made an appearance was added to the end of Jou's thought for some dramatic effect. And then, there Jou was, in a white tunic with huge angel wings behind, holding a bow and doing a superhero pose while screaming, 'I'm Jou-Cupid, and I'm here to bring the Yamis and Hikaris together!'

His thought was rudely cut off by _the voice_.

_Very nice of you to do that, Jou-Cupid. Can you also bring yourself and Kaiba together while you are at it?_

_- Go away, voice. I already told ya that there is nothin' between meh and Moneybags, so stop talking nonsense already! -_

_I'm not talking nonsense, Jounouchi, and you know it. You know that I'm right. I'm always right. Stop fooling yourself. Everyone knows that the bickering between you two is just some weird kind of showing feeling for each other._

_- Ya know what, voice. What ya said was just so wrong that I don't even bother to argue with ya anymore. And whadda ya mean by 'everyone'? -_

_Oh you know, as in, EVERYONE._

_- Why are ya… -_

'Jou, Jou,' someone was shaking him. Blinking once, then twice, Jou found himself looking straight into a pair of big amethyst eyes that were filled with worry.

'Eh, Yug', why are ya bein' so close?' the ex-gang member mumbled.

Yugi let out a sigh of relief, and looked back at the rest of the group.

'He's back.'

Jou was confused. 'Whadda ya mean by "I'm back"? I'm still 'ere, am I not?'

'You zoned out, Jou,' Ryou explained softly. 'We were so worry, seeing your eyes suddenly looked so unfocused like that.'

'Not to mention you didn't even touch your foods,' Marik pointed out. 'It's something the matter?'

'Ooh, he does care,' Atemu taunted, earning a hateful glare from the blonde Yami.

'Shut it,' Marik hissed. 'Or I will send you to the Shadow Realm.'

'But Marik,' Malik grinned. 'Why deny that you do care for Jou? Everyone pretty much knows he is your surrogate sis… I mean, brother.'

Jou huffed. 'What is wrong with you guys and saying that I'm Bak'ra and Marik's sister anyway? I'm a boy, dammit!'

'But you are pretty,' Marik pretty much whined. 'And you DO look like a girl. If I'm not in love with Mal… I mean, someone, I would sure jump you by now.'

The others, excluding Jou who was grinning like a maniac, all looked at the blonde Yami in shock.

'Marik?' Malik frowned. 'What do you mean by you are in love with someone? Who are you in love with anyway?'

Jou grinned mentally while looking at the fidgeting Marik, who was mumbling that it was nothing and that his Hikari-mine shouldn't worry about something so stupid like that.

_- Hehe, he almost admitted he is in love with Malik. And Malik is jealous with the thought that Marik likes someone. Oooh, this is rich! -_

'Come on, Marik, don't need to be shy,' Bakura smirked. 'Tell us who your crush is so that Malik could go and kill him off.'

Malik nodded subconsciously, then whipped his head to glare at the former Thief King with the, 'What the hell do you mean by that?', while Marik blinked with the, 'How do you know my crush is a boy?'

'It's not much of a surprise, really,' Yugi smiled. 'Everyone in our group is gay or bi, I'm sure of that.'

Atemu looked curious. 'You are gay, aibou?'

Yugi just blushed.

**x x x**

'YES! School is finally over! Freedom!' Jou bumped his fist to the air, ignoring the odd looks people were giving him.

'Jou, want to go the Game Shop?' Yugi said, laughing at his best friend's enthusiasm.

Jou just waved his hand around. 'Nah, not today Yug'. I hav work to do.'

'Do you need help?' Atemu asked, but Jou only shook his head.

'Don't worry, guys,' he said. 'I can do this by myself.'

'Are you sure, Jou-kun?' Ryou tilted his head a little.

Jou nodded. 'Positive. So, you guys go and hav some fun, okay? I will see ya all t'morrow.'

With a wave, Jou went to the opposite direction, cackling mentally at all the ideas he had about how to get his friends together.

_- They will hav'ta thank me once they are together. Because there is just no way I will fail. Not with all of my plans! Whahahaha, I'm a genius! Bow down to me, world. Just you wait and see, Jou-Cupid will put the Yamis and Hikaris together! -_

_You need your medicine. And fast. I'm serious._

_- My happiness is too great to be ruined by the boring you, voice. Now go away. I'm congratulating myself. -_

Jou turned around the corner, and froze. That feeling again! He stood there, completely still, trying to make sure that the predator gaze was real and not just a fragment of his imagination. Once he knew for sure that, yes, there was someone behind him, watching him, Jou slowly turned around, cautious, wondering if the feeling would disappear like last time.

No. This time, the feeling stayed.

'Who are you?' Jou wanted to ask out loud, and he would sure to do that if it wasn't for the fact that there were people around. 'Why are you following me and my friends?'

Instead of asking and made himself look like a crazy teenager in the eyes of others, Jou settled down in finding where the gaze came from though. Using his (_- awesome -_) street senses, it didn't take him long to find what he was looking for.

_- Up there. –_ Jou thought. _– I've caught you now. -_

Jou narrowed his eyes to see who his stalker was, but all he could make out was the silhouette of a small figure in a cloak. It felt like forever though, both of them stood there, staring silently at each other, until, much to Jou's surprise, the person suddenly jumped down and moved faster than you could say 'Duel Monsters'.

And Jou couldn't see that person anymore.

**x x x**

**Me: 'Yatta, chapter 1, completed!'**

**Seto: -re-reads the chapter- 'You know what? I have to say that…'**

**Me: -look eager- 'Yes?'**

**Seto: '…this chapter…'**

**Me: '…go on…'**

**Seto: '…is utterly stupid.'**

**Me: -shock- 'Wha-?'**

**Seto: 'I will be surprised if anyone spends their time to read this. If I were the reader, I would flush your story down the toilet.' –triumphantly leaves the room, the tail of his trench coat flails behind dramatically-**

**Me: -too shock to react-**

**x x x**

**R&R, minna-san :)**


	2. Chapter 2

**Me: 'See that, Seto, see that? I do have some reviews. HA! In your face!'**

**Seto: 'Tsk. They just reviewed because they pitied you.'**

**Me: -gasp- 'Seto, how could you? That's it, you are fired!'**

**Seto: -turns around and leaves- 'Whatever. You didn't even hire me in the first place anyway.' -the door slams shut-**

**Me: '…'**

**Me: '… he really leaves?'**

**Me: 'Damn. Who will do the disclaimer now?' -look around- 'Anyone?'**

**(No one answers)**

**Me: -pout- 'I guess I have to do it myself then.' -clear throat- 'I don't own Yu-gi-oh or any of the characters. But I want to!' -burst into tears-**

**Mokuba: -comes in- 'Is nii-sama here?... You are in your depressed mode, aren't you?'**

**Me: -take a one eighty and grin- 'Oh look! Mokieeee ~!'**

**Mokuba: -goes pale- 'Oh no…'**

**x x x**

**Chapter 2: Bipolar Much?**

'Jou, what are you doing?' Honda asked, looking over Jou's shoulder when he saw the blonde writing something like his life depended on it.

'I'm doin' some research,' Jou mumbled in reply, still scribing down furiously. 'I need all the clues I could hav ta figure out who that stalk'r is…'

Honda blinked, then looked closer to see exactly what his buddy was writing.

'…_wears cloak, can't see the gender. Spies on people for some unknown purposes. Suspect has no good intentions, I have an uneasy feeling whenever that person is near. Might have ninja skills_... eh, Jou, what is this that you are writing?'

'Someone is spyin' on meh,' Jou hissed. 'Since two days ago. They spy on meh practically days and nights, and it's bloody annoyin'. They know I know that they are spyin' on me, but apparently, they hav ninja skills. Whenever I try ta get nearer to make out who the heck they are, they just vanish. And I mean it! Like they don't even there in da first place, and it's driving me crazy! (_I hate to break it to you, Jounouchi, but you're already crazy. –Shut up! I'm not crazy. Just mentally unstable.-_) I hav lots of plans ta do, but because of the stalk'r, none of them could be start!' (_-And that means I couldn't play Jou-Cupid. Damn stalk'r. I hate stalk'r. Ooh look, a bird just passes the window. Aww, how cute!-. Great, random moment again. –Be quiet, voice!-_)

Sitting down on the seat next to his friend, Honda put his elbow on the desk, and leaned his cheek on the knuckles. 'Are you sure you didn't imagine it out?'

Jou whipped his head to glare at Honda so fast that the brunet afraid the blonde was going to have whiplash right there and then.

'Are ya implying dat I hav persecutory delusion?' Jou snapped loudly, earning everyone's attention, who wondered what Jou's problem was. The ex-gang member just ignored them all. Instead, he stood up, slammed his hands on the desk harshly before seizing Honda up by his collar. 'Listen 'ere, Hiroto! Whatever that bitch of a psychiatrist told you, they are all lies! Lies, lies, lies, you 'ear me?! I don't hav any mental problems! I don't hav complex visual hallucinations, or schizophrenia, or am I bipolar!'

'JOU!'

The moment later, Jou found himself being held back by the three Yamis, while the Hikaris were busy checking the bewildered Honda for any injuries. The rest of the class just stared at the fuming Jou in shock, who was struggling to escape the Yamis to jump and throttle his shark-haired friend.

'Lemme go, lemme go, I hav ta kill him!' Jou roared in fury, and the three former spirits wondered where all of his strength suddenly came from. They were having hard time holding him back!

Yugi didn't know what was going on! He was going to their class with the other Hikaris and their Yamis, when all of a sudden, they heard yelling. Loud, furious yelling that was coming from their destination. Wide-eyed, all of them all bolted to the classroom just to see Jou practically choked Honda, his friend since secondary, right in the middle of the crowd while shouting in what one could call 'yakuza accent'.

And now, it seemed that the Yamis couldn't hold him back.

'We need a rope!' Bakura shouted. 'I think Retriever has lost it!'

'A rope?' Marik shouted back, now holding Jou's arms behind his back with difficult. 'Are you stupid? We need more than _a _rope!'

'HE BITES ME!' Atemu roared, waving his hand around, which was bleeding a little. 'DAMN IT! JUST BIND HIM WITH SHADOW MAGIC!'

'Honda,' Yugi cried, 'What did you do to anger Jou like that?'

'I didn't do anything,' Honda mumbled, still in shock. 'We… were just talking, and Jou told me that he had the feeling someone was spying on him. I asked him if he just… imagined it out. Then he became like… that.'

He motioned to the floor, where the Yamis were struggling to retrain the furious Jou, who was snapping and cursing. The group didn't seem to realize that they were now the only ones in the room, because the rest of the class had escaped the 'war-zone' when they saw even the three enigmas (aka the Yamis) had problem with the blonde.

'Ya implied that I was crazy!' Jou yelled, glaring at Honda angrily.

'I did no such thing!'

'LIAR!'

And that was what Seto saw when he stepped inside the classroom. Raising a brow at the scene, he now understood what his classmates were talking about.

He was a little late today, all because of his limo. That stupid thing decided to have a problem that morning, and it took his chauffeur forever to find the problem and fix it. When he came near his classroom, the young CEO found most of his classmates were outside, looking traumatized while whispering to each other. Ignoring the pleas from his fangirls (and fanboys) to not enter the 'war-zone', Seto still opened the door to see what was the ruckus.

'Just what the hell is wrong with that make-inu?' the CEO thought, watching as Bakura held Jou down by the legs while Marik took a firm hold at the blonde's arms, and Atemu was binding Jou with that stupid magic of theirs. Still, it appeared that Jou somehow was much, much stronger today, because he was definitely giving his friend a hard time.

'Muto,' he called, earning Yugi's attention.

'Oh hey, Kaiba,' Yugi replied awkwardly, seeing that no one else was in the room but them.

'What's the Mutt's problem?'

'We don't know,' Ryou said, helping Malik pick up all of Jou's stuffs on the floor, which all fell down when the blonde and the Yamis practically had a wrestling earlier.

'What do you mean you don't know?' Seto frowned.

'It means we don't know,' Malik growled in annoyance. 'When we came in, he was already like that. And he tried to kill Honda.'

Both of Seto's eyebrows shot up, and he turned to look at the said boy, he looked kind of paled. Yugi was massaging his shoulders.

'You know what his problem is?' the CEO asked.

'Not really, ' Honda muttered. 'We talked, and he just suddenly yelled at me and tried to choke me…'

'YA CALLED MEH CRAZY!'

'I DID NOT CALL YOU THAT!' Honda snapped. 'I JUST ASKED YOU ONE. FUCKING. QUESTION!'

'And what question could it be?' Seto was amused with the whole thing. Who knew Bonkotsu could provide such… entertainment.

'What is it to you?' Malik narrowed his eyes at Seto. On the background, Jou just punched Marik on the face, just to be tackle down by Atemu, while Bakura, who had been kicked on the stomach earlier, painfully picked himself up.

Seto chuckled. 'Just curious,' His blue eyes looked at Honda, waiting for the answer.

'…he said someone was spying on him, and I asked if he imagined it out,' Honda sighed tiredly. 'And he went berserk.'

'What made him think someone was spying on him?'

'Apparently, he spot some cloaked figure who seemed to follow him days and nights for the past two days, and whenever he tried to see them closer, they just… vanished like ninja…'

'Sound like a fangirl,' Seto mused. 'Or a fanboy.'

At his words, Jou suddenly stopped his violence, and blinked at his archenemy.

'Eh? Whadda ya mean by dat, Kaiba?' he asked in curious, all the trace of his previous barbaric behaviour just disappeared, like nothing ever happened, like he didn't just attack his friends.

Everyone blinked at the sudden mood changed of Jou, and all of them had the same thought. 'Could it possible… that he is bipolar?'

'Kaiba?' Jou called, tilting his head to a side, which made Seto immediately think how cute he looked.

'Wait a minute,' the brunet thought in utter horror. 'What did I just think? The pup, cute? And did I just call him "pup"?'

A whack behind the head snapped Seto out of his thought. Moaning at the pain while holding his head, Seto looked up to see Jou's friends had the look of horror on their faces, while the said puppy was scowling at him.

'Did you just hit me, Bonkotsu?' the master of BEWD hissed, itching to kill the blonde right on spot.

Jou just smiled brightly, making everyone once again look at him in bewilderment ('His mood sure changes fast!').

'Of course I hit ya,' the blonde now cackled madly. 'It was fun, hehehehehe…'

Seto stared at Jou, wide-eyed. Okay, it's official. The pup scared him.

_You scare them._

_-Nonsense. I did no such thing! Besides, why should they be scared of meh? If they should be scared of anyone, they should be scared of Nyan. Damn, that stupid cat is just so annoyin'. Nyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyan…-_

_I told you NOT to skip your medicine today!_

_-…nyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanyanya…-_

…_that's it. I hereby announce that I don't know you, Jounouchi._

_-…nyanyanyanyanyanyanyanya…-_

'Jou?' Ryou called out softly, and Jou immediately went back to the real world.

'Yeah, Ry?' he grinned. Like a maniac.

Ryou let out a small 'eep', and hid behind Bakura.

This only made Jou cackle some more. Then, he went serious, and turned his attention back to Seto, who was thinking that maybe, maybe he should call the mental asylum. And sent this make-inu there.

'Oi, Kaiba,' Jou said, his accent completely gone. 'What do you mean be that?'

Seto blinked. 'That?'

'Yes, that.'

'…'

'…'

'… I seriously don't know what do you mean.'

No rolling eyes or whatever, acting completely out of character, Jou only said calmly.

'Earlier, you said something about fangirl. And fanboy. What do you mean by that?'

From the outside, Seto looked calm. But inside, he was mentally making an 'oh' face.

'Oh, so that is what you mean,' he folded his arms across his chest. 'Well, like I said, all the descriptions fit a fangirl, or fanboy, considering that they wear a cloak and you can't see their face. You seem to have a stalker of a fan, no less, Mutt. So congratulation. You have attracted a dangerous kind of fans to yourself.'

'What do you mean?' Marik wondered, but was thinking that maybe, maybe the crazy Jou could help him take over the world. After all, his surrogate little sis… brother was the Pharaoh and his Hkari's best friend, and there was no way, as in _no way_ the baka-Pharaoh would do anything to harm his friend. Yes, that was a fool-proofed plan. Now, how to persuade his pretty little sister… eh, little brother to work with him…

No one seemed to realize what kind of thought the blonde Yami was having though, because they were all paying close attention to Seto, who started talking.

'A stalker fangirl/fanboy is the worst of them all, ' Seto explained, all serious, like he was in the middle of an important meeting. 'They are unpredictable, sneaky, and they DO have ninja skills. That's the scientific fact, I'm serious. They are, basically, afraid of nothing, and would do anything to follow their target to the end of the world, even using illegal methods if need.'

The others, excluding Jou, shuddered. That sounded scary.

'Did you say all of that from experience?' Atemu asked, trying to ignore the crazed look his best friend was having in his eyes. If it wasn't for the fact that Marik and Malik were both having a traumatized look on their faces at Jou's behaviour, the former Pharaoh might think that those two had possessed Jou again.

'You have no idea,' was all Seto said.

Jou chose the exact moment to cackle, again. Yugi suddenly remembered the film he watched a week ago, about a psychopath who also cackled like that whenever he cornered his victim and hacked them violently to a mess of blood and fless. Jou's cackle seriously reminded him of those scenes.

'Bonkotsu, stop that!' Seto snapped, glaring at Jou. 'Do you know how creepy that sounds?'

Jou ignored them all. Instead, he looked straight out of the window and pointed at the nearby tree.

'YES! I hav an upper hand now, ya stalk'r!' he exclaimed gleefully, accent back at full force. 'I know what kind of creeps ya are, and it's just a matter of time until I find out yur identity. Just ya wait! No one stalks Jounouchi Katsuya and gets away wit' it!'

The others also stared out of the window, looking for what Jou was pointing at. Of course, they saw nothing at all.

'Blondie, what the fuck are you looking at?' Marik asked, voicing out what everyone was thinking in a rather rude way.

Jou just waved his hand slightly. 'Don't need ta worry about dat. The stalk'r is gone. We are safe. For now.'

He cackled again, and suddenly pulled out a bow and a quiver of arrows from his school bag. His friends' eyes widened in shock and horror. Shock, because they wondered how those things could fit inside Jou's bag, and horror, because they were real things.

'Now dat da stalk'r is gone,' Jou mumbled, holding the bow while strapping the quiver behind his back, 'It's time ta start my mission. Hehehehehehehehehehehe….'

'…what mission?' even though he didn't think he wanted to know the answer, Atemu still felt the need to ask.

Jou answered him by pointing the bow AND the arrow at the former Pharaoh, a crazy grin on his face.

'I learnt how ta use dis stuffs,' he said, while the others slowly backing away. 'And I'm pretty sure I could hit da target right ta da heart. And ya'll all thank meh once dis is all over…'

With that, he shot.

The whole group screamed. Like a gir… I mean, like a man. Manly scream…

…Jou just laughed maniacally

_While you are at it, shoot Kaiba with a special arrow._

_- Special arrow? What special arrow?'_

_You know which one. The one that makes him fall in love with you…_

_- WHAT NONSENSE ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? -_

…_isn't that what you want? For him to love you just like you love him?_

_- Ya hav lost it, voice. I told ya I don't hav any feeling fer 'im…-_

_You are in denial ~_

_- Whatever. Just shaddad. I'm doin' my job as Jou-Cupid 'ere. Da Yamis and da Hikaris need ta be together before da world coming ta an end. And I hav ta hurry up before __**it**__ returns and ruins ev'rythin'. -_

_**It**__?_

_- Da stalk'r .-_

_Oh…_

_- Yeah. So please piss off fer meh to do my work, voice. -_

While Jou's friends jumping around to avoid all the deadly arrows coming from the not so sane blonde, and Jou was shooting his so-called love arrows while talking mentally to _the voice_, Seto stood in the corner, far away from those psychos and whispering furiously into his phone.

'Is that Domino Mental Asylum? This is Kaiba Seto, and I think I have found one of your escapees…'

**x x x**

**Me: '…'**

**Mokuba: '…'**

**Me: '…so, what do you think of this chapter?'**

**Mokuba: '…if I tell you what I think, will you untie me and let me go?'**

**Me: 'Maybe… Now, tell me.'**

**Mokuba: 'It's okay, I guess. Though, Jou seems to be OOC…'**

**Me: 'That's because in my story, he is mentally unstable. But it makes him more interesting and funny, no?'**

**Mokuba: '…if you say so. Can I go now?'**

**x x x**

**R&R, minna-san :)**

**See you all next week! **


End file.
